he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
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