I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize