Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Randomize
