Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize