Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
