Where are you?
In a non slutty way
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
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