My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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