I love having hate sex.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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