Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Randomize
