we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
