Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Randomize
