What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
Randomize
