apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
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