And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Randomize