I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
