i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
