i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Randomize
