I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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