we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Randomize
