he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
