mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
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