that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize
