How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
