I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
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