WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Randomize
