you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
I woke up under a house in Key West
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
