I bet he comes in French.
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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