This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Randomize
