She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
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