We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
