pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize
