question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Randomize