butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Even the bartender felt bad for me
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
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