Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
Randomize
