he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Randomize