i permit you to call me
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
