There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize