Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Someone shit on the floor
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize