oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
