He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Randomize
