my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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