R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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