Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Randomize