Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
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