he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
