I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
i think im in europe. pls send help
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Randomize