of course. lets lasso hookers.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Your christmas gifts are already wrapped, how on top of my shit am I?
I'm hungover as fuck and had to break into my own house by throwing a cinder block through my back door at 4am. You're more on top of your shit than me.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Randomize
