I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Randomize
