Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
So gin and wine won't be happening again
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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