he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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