try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Randomize
