Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Your cock deserves a montage
Someone came in the potted fern
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Randomize
