just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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