she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
